I am not a person who wants to do work that’s “good enough.” I want to do work that’s Excellent, that Exceeds Expectations, that improves my life and the lives of those who come into contact with my work. Good Enough is not good enough for me, and it isn’t for you, either, if you are striving to have real impact in the world.
 
But I struggle sometimes to feel like I, as a human being, am Good Enough. Just as I am. With my flaws and my weaknesses. I’m worthy of success and respect and goodness, even though I’m imperfect. In this case, Good Enough is good enough. Good Enough is perfect. Good Enough is human.
 
Only when we accept ourselves as Good Enough are we able to make work that is more than Good Enough.

Are you ready to stop dreading performance reviews, critiques, workshops, and debriefings?
As promised, here are my 6 easy steps to receiving feedback:

1. Listen. Don’t interject. If you have a clarifying question, ask it. Otherwise keep your mouth shut.
   
2. Say “thank you.” If someone is giving you feedback, either you asked for their opinion, or they are offering it because they believe in you and they want you to succeed.
   
3. Write it down. All of it. The stuff that resonates, the stuff that makes no sense, the stuff that pisses you off, the stuff that affirms what you already believe. Write it all down accurately because, as much as it doesn’t seem like you will ever forget the feeling of receiving feedback (especially tough feedback), you will, and you’ll want your notes for reference.
   
4. Sleep on it. Or go take a walk. Don’t think about the feedback for a while.
   
5. Find what resonates. Look over your notes, and find the feedback that strikes a chord. This is an intuitive thing – an idea or a suggestion will stick out to you, your thoughts will catch on it like a sweater on a nail. Take note of these. This is the feedback that’s valuable.
   
6. Implement.
   

 
Let’s stop thinking of feedback as “positive” or “negative.” Let’s think of all feedback the way bats use sonar. It helps us position ourselves in the darkness. It informs our next move. It helps us navigate. If we can stop taking feedback personally, we can implement it more effectively.

Learning how to say “I don’t know” is almost as empowering as learning how to say a proper “no.”
 
In both cases, we are fighting against cultural pressure to accommodate others. Women especially are expected to be “agreeable” and “helpful” and “nice” at all times. Admitting that you don’t know something feels like admitting to failure – you are stupid, incompetent, unqualified.
 
But what happens when you say “I don’t know” is that you become human. The person asking you the question feels a kinship with you – ah, neither of us knows! Let’s find out together. It is so refreshing when we realize this.

Try it! Say "I don't know" three times today. See what happens when you communicate with honesty. Lean into the unknowing.